What I mean by this is setting a goal to end a habit or achieve a milestone.
For example, when Trey was three and a half, we starting telling him that when he turned four, it would be time to stop sucking his thumb. Every few days we would just mention it to him and move on. After a while it became ingrained, this was part of turning four and sure enough, when he turned four, he stopped sucking his thumb.
Having done this several times with the kids, I felt that it was one hundred percent successful.
That is before I encountered Trey's great resistance to wiping his own butt.
We talked about wiping his own butt when he turned five, with great enthusiasm. Starting a few months ahead, he practiced wiping his own butt once before mom would come follow through. About a month before, he moved to two wipes.
I am feeling good about this.
Freedom from standing in a really small space, trying to have a conversation with someone who is red faced and occasionally grunting!
Freedom from having little arms clutch around your knees while you take aim, armed with toilet paper.
FREEDOM FROM MISSING!
The day finally came. He turned five in late December and the Hallelujah Chorus rang out throughout the house.
FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST! THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, I AM FREE AT LAST!
Can you say "cruel joke?" I knew you could!
He is pretty much doing his own wiping at this point. But he doesn't want to be ALONE.
Here is yesterday's exchange:
T- "Mom, can you come in here?"
M- "Why, Trey?"
T- "Because I am pooping."
Mom, aggravated- "Trey, you are five now. You can wipe your own butt. Why do you need me there????"
Pause.
T- "Because I LIKE you!"
What a sucker punch!
I know the day is coming, faster than I realize, when my kids won't want me around as much, when I will wish for a time to talk to them and feel needed by them.
So I went into the tiny bathroom, sat on a little stool, and hung out with my little man.
But he wiped his own butt, dammit!
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2 comments:
I cannot stress how your diary is the perfect antidote to schoolwork. Keep it up. Your insights are keen and hilarious. The writing has great rhythm, diversity, and it's relaxed. I tell you, keep it up, this is great stuff. You're making me jealous!
Richard
We just went through this with my 5 y.o. daughter. We gave her the talk "now that you're going into Kindergarten" it's time to wipe your own bottom! It was a struggle but she's done it. Now I have to work on getting #3 out of diapers. Ugh - hate potty training.
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