Growing up

Last night, late, around 10 PM, I picked Trey up from his last track meet of the season.

In a radical departure for me as a parent, I did not attend a single track meet. 

Why? 

First, because they are LONG. Crazy long. Like, this one was seven hours long, 45 minutes away each way, for him to compete twice at five minutes each time.

Second, because after the second week of track practice, he asked if he could quit. He wasn't enjoying it bc his friends weren't on the team this year. I get that, for sports Trey is much more about the social aspect than the competition or sport itself. I told him no, but when the play practices kicked in he could back off of it. 

So, given that he didn't really care about his performance and didn't want to be there much himself, my motivation to go was pretty darn low!

That being said, I WILL give a nod to him that the last two track meets of the season, once the play practices had begun in earnest, he technically didn't have to go to. Kids do skip track meets frequently  it seems. I gave him my opinion and then left it up to him as to whether he would go or not. He chose to go, and he fulfilled the commitment he made when he joined the team. I was so pleased by this. Those meets are so long and so boring, and yet he made himself do the right thing. Good boy!

•••

Kate and Bobby successfully created their own cell phone account and have transferred their numbers over. I have one less phone line to pay for and they have completed another step of adulting! 

Bobby starts his new job soon. I am excited for him and hope it is what he wants it to be. They will be moving closer to me soon and I am super excited about that too!

•••

Chris has been preparing/studying for the LSAT over Christmas Break.  That kid has great motivation and drive. He got his highest score yet on a practice test- 169! VERY WELL DONE, Chris. I am proud of you!

•••

Midterms are over for Trey and a new quarter is starting. I am so glad. Fresh slate and hopefully better grades this quarter.

I had a nice conversation with him in the car last night, which is somewhat of a rarity in and of itself.

He said he was pleased with his ACT score. I agreed that it was great in English and with his score he will likely get into a couple of colleges on his list, but that he will need to retake it for the math/science part. He already knows this- we discussed it.

I then said that we would be having conversations this year- he, his dad and I. About what he wants to do next, what his ideas and visions are for himself. I told him we don't want to force him into anything.

He agreed that he absolutely knew this and commented that he didn't feel forced and that he wasn't the kind of kid who could be forced anyway.. that once he turned 18 he could ultimately make his own decisions. 

I agreed and said that we would be supportive of course, but that it could be hard to be an 18 year old out there on his own, if parents were not supportive.. having to pay rent, buy food etc.

"Yeah, but I know myself and I could do it," he replied. "I know who I am and I am a strong person. I like myself. I would eat a lot of eggs; they are cheap and the perfect nutritional food."

I agreed and smiled at him but inside my heart sang. Things aren't always easy for this kid but what he has said to me tonight is that he feels happy with himself, he feels settled in himself right now. He believes in himself. 

And I have really been unsure about that and worried about that. Above all else, that is most important. College or not, great grades or not, that will take him a long way in this life when things get hard. 

You go, Boy.