How do I have time,
how do I think of what to say, etc.
Today's post is the very reason why I blog..
so I don't forget those little moments
or those parts of a day-
that in the moment I was living it-
I was consciously thinking
"I never want to forget how I feel RIGHT NOW."
This morning was your typical kind of school morning.
Up too early, tired, dragging down to the kitchen
to start the breakfast and lunches.
It was still dark outside, raining and about 20 degrees below normal-
a toasty upper 30s outside in mid-October.
I turn on the radio as I often do
while I get breakfast started.
A few moments later, the beginning notes of
"I Got A Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas come across the airwaves.
YES! This is the perfect song to start my day on a positive note.
I crank it up and start dancing around the kitchen:
"I got a feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night.."
About a minute into the song (and my dancing)
I look up to see Kate come into the kitchen via the dining room.
She's not just coming in.. she is DANCING in!
My often tired and vaguely sullen, not-a-morning-person daughter
is be-bopping her way into the kitchen.
The song is infectious and we both smile as we groove around the island,
singing along loudly with big smiles on our faces.
Breakfast was doled out and after eating, Kate heads upstairs
to finish getting ready while Trey eats and I make his lunch.
Wait! What is that I hear?
The first notes of "1, 2, 3, 4 (I love you)" by the Plain White T's!
Trey and I love this song!
Once again I crank it up and Trey looks up, his eyes crinkling in happiness
as a grin sweeps across his face.
I dance around while he grooves in his barstool
and when the chorus comes on,
we sign it together to each other:
"I'm so glad I found you,
I love being around you.
You make it easy,
as easy as 1, 2,
1, 2, 3, 4
There's only one thing
I love you!"
When it ends, we are dissolved in giggles
and just awash in happiness.
"THIS," I thought to myself
as he headed upstairs to brush his teeth
and I put his napkin in his lunch box and zipped it up.
"This is why I am here.
These small moments of pure and clear love and joy
that burn white hot.
These are the moments that I never, ever want to forget."
These feelings, these moments
are the ones that I worry most about losing to time
and the busyness of life.
I don't worry about forgetting the big events
and the pivotal moments.
It's these little, perfect, fleeting pictures of time
that I never want to lose.
That fourteen year old daughter dancing in the kitchen
with the glint of her braces reflecting the light
on an other wise dreary day..
braces that in six months will become only a memory.
The seven year old son wriggling on his bar stool,
fingers signing "I love you" with his little hands crossed over his heart
and pointing at me.. At me!
How well I know that this unabashed adoration will quickly fade.
Yes, these are the moments to remember-
the simple mornings of a life.